If you're anything like me (and let's face it, there's no way you could be) Easter can be a tricky time for gift-giving.

Chocolate eggs give you diabetes. Fluffy toy bunnies are just embarrassing (I mean what are you, five?).

There is only one solution, darlings.


DARLINGS! IT'S REALLY HAPPENING! I'M GOING TO EUROVISION!

Thanks to the scores of fans who signed my petition I'll be heading to Copenhagen in May to perform at Europe's biggest cultural event, with Jessica Mauboy as my support act.

Exciting news this morning darlings, as it's been announced AUSTRALIA will have a starring role in this year's Eurovision song contest in Copenhagen!

This is now geographically correct.

Everyone's talking about Marcia Hines getting her cricketers confused on Twitter yesterday, but that's not half as embarrassing as what she tweeted a few hours later:


Darlings, with my Melbourne Comedy Festival shows fast approaching, I thought I should do some research and investigate the local fashions.






Darlings... What can I say?







Darlings